the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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