I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
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