if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
