why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
