I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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