The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Randomize
