This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
