how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
