I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
last night I used snow as a chaser
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