My underwear smells like fireworks.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
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