Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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