Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Let's paint friendship bongs
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
