I like my sex mixed with concussions.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
