My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
