Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
