Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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