Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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