remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
