You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
