I'm laying in your front yard are you home
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
