i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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