I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Randomize
