dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
is that a dick in a sweater?
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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