Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
