no you cant smoke seaweed
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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