sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize
