How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
