see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
