I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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