The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize
