is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
