sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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