i can't believe i had my finger in that
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
