This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize