We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
where are my eyebrows?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
