Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
