ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Randomize
