So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
