I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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