he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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