he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
