you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
