If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We have so much sex to catch up on
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
