David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Idk if I want to put a bra on
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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