would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize