he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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