Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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