This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
