you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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