i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
