I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
