I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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